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Economist: Someone who is good with numbers but lacks the personality to be an accountant.

Credit: Matthew Holtz

"Algebraic symbols are used when you do not know what you are talking about."

Credit: Matthew Holtz

The Programmers' Cheer --

Shift to the left, shift to the right!
Pop up, push down, byte, byte, byte!

Credit: Matthew Holtz

Other cheers:

E to the x dx dy
radical transcendental pi
secant cosine tangent sine
come on folks let's integerate!!

Credit: Matthew Holtz

Three men are in a hot-air balloon. Soon, they find themselves lost in a canyon somewhere. One of the three men says, "I've got an idea. We can call for help in this canyon and the echo will carry our voices far."

So he leans over the basket and yells out, "Helllloooooo! Where are we?" (They hear the echo several times.)

15 minutes later, they hear this echoing voice: "Helllloooooo! You're lost!!"

One of the men says, "That must have been a mathematician."

Puzzled, one of the other men asks, "Why do you say that?"

The reply: "For three reasons. (1) he took a long time to answer, (2) he was absolutely correct, and (3) his answer was absolutely useless."

Credit: Matthew Holtz

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